Subject: FW: Bush Sells Louisiana Back to the French
BATON ROUGE, LA. * The White House announced today that President Bush
has successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more than
double its original selling price of $11,250,000.
"This is a bold step forward for America," said Bush. "And America
will be stronger and better as a result. I stand here today in unity with
French Prime Minister Jack Chirac, who was so kind to accept my offer of
Louisiana in exchange for 25 million dollars cash."
"Jack understands full well that this one's a 'fixer upper,'" said
Bush. "He and the French people are quite prepared to pump out all that
water, and make Louisiana a decent place to live again. And they've got a
lot of work to do. But Jack's assured me, if it's not right, they're going
to fix it."
The move has been met with incredulity from the already beleaguered
residents of Louisiana.
However, President Bush's decision has been widely lauded by
"This is an unexpected but brilliant move by the President," said
Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. "Instead of spending billions and
billions, and billions of dollars rebuilding the state of Louisiana, we've
just made 25 million dollars in pure profit."
"This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News analyst Brit Hume.
"Not only have we stopped the flooding in our own budget, we've made money
on the deal. Plus, when the god-awful French are done fixing it up, we can
easily invade and take it back again."
The money gained from 'The Louisiana Refund' is expected to be
immediately pumped back into the rebuilding of Iraq.